confessions of an A.R. person...

Hi there folks, Some of you have made a few pointed jabs at the fact that I have not been updating my blog at all in the last few months. I keep meaning to get to it (to the point of pencilling it in my calendar), but as of yet have not. I have about 10 posts that I created titles for, some which I have made notes for, none of which are finished... I have a problem, I can't bear to have a big gaping hole of 3 months missing in my blog, and because of this, I am overwhelmed and unable to get past the looming sense of dread and actually write a post! Is that A.R. (which stands for anal retentive, a phrase I picked up in BC this last visit) or what? It bugs me that my archive doesn't have at least one entry for each month! I feel at least somewhat justified in my not posting because my life has been the craziest, and most hellish experience ever this past semester (school & personally), BUT the gaping hole also reminds me that I am failing miserably at leading the balanced life that I strive and ache to create. It is time to take action: I am going to resolve this problem by turning one of said titles into a published post every weekend. You are going to hold me to it. At the end of this I will feel better, and then I will set up some kind of goal or schedule for new posts. On a lighter note: I have gotten back all my marks from last term. I had straight A's!!!!! I have to say that this is a complete act of God because I was really having the worst time of my life. My head & heart were not in school mode, I didn't read textbooks, could hardly take notes, was just generally distracted and listless. I should not have gotten A's based on my diligence with school, and yet I got better marks than I normally do when I'm working hard and reading all my textbooks. So, praise God! (and thanks for teaching me the lesson that it's ok to let loose sometimes & not hold everything together, You really are Big Enough!) Disclaimer: I want you all to know that while I like to have at least a B in all of my classes, I do not cry myself to sleep when I don't achieve that, I have gotten some lower grades that I was quite proud of because I knew that I had worked hard and put in all that I had.