Elianna was with us for 100 days. Today marks 100 days without her. It's strange how quickly some things can return to normal, though it really never will be the same normal as before.
Physically in our home things look more normal, the medical supplies have been removed, the cradle is put away, our daily routine has shifted again to what feels normal. My heart mourns but also finds some relief in the newfound space in my life for living. The three hour feeding schedule was really hard for me, and having free time feels foreign, but is a gift and I am trying to use it well in light of the perspective gained through this experience.
April 17 from Jesus Calling:
I am training you in steadiness. Too many things interrupt your awareness of Me. I know that you live in a world of sight and sound, but you must not be a slave to those stimuli. Awareness of Me can continue in all circumstances, no matter what happens. This is the steadiness I desire for you.
Don’t let unexpected events throw you off course. Rather, respond calmly and confidently, remembering that I am with you. As soon as something grabs your attention, talk with Me about it. Thus I share your joys and your problems; I help you cope with whatever is before you. This is how I live in you and work through you. This is the way of Peace.
He will have no fear of bad news; his heart is steadfast, trusting in the Lord.
—Psalm 112:7
“Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, yes, I will help you, I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”
—Isaiah 41:10 nkjv
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