Lessons

Life has carried on in a surprising whirlwind. I am finding myself motivated to take better care of myself with my suddenly freed up time. Classes at the gym, time with friends and trying to find a better balance. Still fall short on the spiritual care side of things but I read this from Jesus Calling today:

I am a God who gives and gives and gives. When I died for you on the cross, I held back nothing; I poured out My Life like a drink offering. Because giving is inherent in My nature, I search for people who are able to receive in full measure.

That lesson of learning to receive is one that I have learned in the last half a year (has it been that long? it's hard to believe but Elianna would be six months old on April 1). I keep thinking our time must be up, but gifts keep coming, kindness keeps coming our way. It's overwhelming. I try to just accept and be grateful. Even when I can't be grateful directly because the gifts come anonymously.

I had an experience yesterday where I offered some help to someone with a baby in NICU and was told it's ok we are fine. It stung a little and for the first time I think really got it (a wise friend keeps telling me that people really want to help and you need to let them). It's a shame that our culture generally makes it hard for us to receive or admit need.

I'm currently involved in a little swap that's been nicknamed sister wife swap. It's just intended to get us together to help out in one household for a day as though there were two wives running the household, for the moral support and back up in crazy moments that it can provide and hopefully tackle jobs that are hanging over us because they just feel too overwhelming. I'm looking forward to it but at the same time it's a little intimidating to be in each other's homes on such a personal and intimate level. Giving and receiving (of course the second is the scarier part).

Anyway. It seems receiving is a theme lately. It's good but humbling to learn about receiving.

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